not exactly what i intended

i thought i'd have more time-- geez

but anyway-- very hectic- work starting up and trying to keep everything organized with that and baseball (and getting stuff ready for school--- i hate applying for loans btw) but its tough-- so yesterday and the day before were work meetings/ making sure everything was going as planned-- which is somewhat the case- the city hasnt put up signs on my parking lot yet which pisses me off cuz theyre supposed to be there- another phone call i'll have to make-- no problem--- and wednesday i had a softball game that got 3 innings in and then lightning delay which led to a rain delay-- i doubt i'll be able to make that game next wednesday because of work-- and idk what im going to do if my baseball team (by some miracle) comes around and wins tonight and tomorrow and sunday--- im pitching tonight so we should have 1 win- tomorrow i'm not so sure about- depends on who we play but baseball is a game where any team can beat any other team on any given day--- so i was up at 6 today to get batting practice and to give a wake up call- for not having taken baseball batting practice i did fairly well (im still gonna be better than the rest of my team and thats kinda sad) but today i'm going to give it all- it could be my 2nd last baseball game this year--- on a different note slash sport... my mom bought me the cleats and receiver gloves i need for football-- i dont like how ncaa rules state that gloves have to be gray- i found a great pair of blue gloves for $20 but i wouldnt be able to use them for anything but practice--- so i'm still excited-- i have work in just under an hour- i still have to print out schedules- get water bottles- organize the days with tickets (for my other supervisor who retains information about as well as a colander holds water)---- so after that, or more so around 1030, sabrina's getting dropped off by jackie and hanging out with me for the weekend- she wants to go to my game and this is prolly the last time i'll get to legit hang out with her before i leave- i took the weekend off for her and picked up the weekday shifts--- so i think thats all for now--- its too bad nobody reads this

first post....

My wave is flowing- flowing up and down as the tide rises rather than the falling I had grown accustomed to- despite the stress that still remains- it isn’t so bad- and theres a lighthouse in the distance--- im excited and anxious and just an organized wreck of emotions- happy and sad- optimistic and pessimistic (although more optimistic)- excited and nervous--- now what am I excited for? Being on a team- in a new school- where I can reestablish myself and be who I want to be- I can be quiet or loud or a complete bitch if I wanted—entirely up to me- what am I nervous about? Leaving home- leaving friends- being far away from Sabrina- and me in general- sometimes I feel like my body is falling apart- as of late- my knee has been bothering me but it could just be growing pains- same with my elbow joints and left wrist—my right thumb is messed up from a fracture getting aggravated but its nothing too bad—I’m excited for football- the first time I’ve seriously played since 7^th grade—and now I’m going into my junior year—and playing 2 d3 sports—yeah I’m a jock but im not dumb- there’s just so much more to sports than winning (a lesson I’ve learned especially well on my summer baseball team because after not playing for 3 years…. I picked right back up and am the albert pujols of my team of college level ball players—sad huh? Its more sad that I bat cleanup and am leading the team in stolen bases)—but I leave in a couple weeks- leaving august 7^th to be exact- getting there for training camp which starts the 9^th—my last day of my parking/fundraising job is the 6^th- so I have a busy schedule--- I want to keep in touch with some people- some people want to keep in touch with me too—but idk- time will tell what works out---I’m also curious what is going to happen when I get to the new school- cuz almost as a rule…. Guys hate me and girls tend to like me more than hate me (which I don’t mind at all) but I think I should try to have like- a man-tourage- instead of surrounding myself with girls which I’ve done since I was old enough to speak logically—cuz I’ve always been the “don’t mess with (insert girls name here)…. She’s close with joe” but wouldn’t mind being the “don’t fuck around with (insert guys name here) cuz he’s tight with joe” guy--- yes I like protecting girls when they need protection but that doesn’t happen all that often- honestly- and im not proud to have found this out- most girls are easy to manipulate- I try my best to make up for what I do though—I’ve gotten so many free lunches (literally and figuratively) out of manipulating…. But its harmless- I don’t go out of my way to do malicious things—oh—by the why--- flirting is a form of manipulation--- just so its clear—so I guess I could still be called a flirt- another thing that I’m excited for- I love meeting new people- and girls—flirting is fun and harmless and doesn’t have to lead to anything—it’s the best way to make friends--- I once heard a saying along the lines of “mimicry is the best form of flattery” and have found it oddly true in people relations—but yeah- anyways---- I’m listening to my sleep playlist and trying to fall asleep- so much to do though- just not at the current moment- softball game later- work meeting before that to talk to my replacement- talking to the student services office at the new school to let them know I’m broke and don’t have the deposits I need to send in right now—then Thursday I should be planning my classes with a teacher—and Friday is my first day of early work- then hanging out with Sabrina and I have a baseball game at 530—and I’m pitching—then Saturday is off- another baseball game for sure and skipping a wedding- then Sunday I might have another game if we keep winning (doubtful but hopeful) then the championship game would be Monday—then if by some freak chance we win that--- we go to Brooklyn for the regional tournament---- I deserve to go but my team really needs to step up- I cant do it by myself and I realize that—I try to be the Michael Jordan of this team (I’m not that good but in the sense that he made his entire team that much better by leading and supporting them)---- I can rearrange work so I can play and not cancel work cuz of games--- but- I’m gonna try to keep up with this- here’s a quick bio of me--- my name is joe- I’m 6’1- 195- play every sport there is somewhat well--- best at baseball and basketball—going to a new school to play at least football and baseball but working on basketball too (at a d3 school in Illinois)- im smart but not book smart- im good at writing when I try- I’m quite the charmer when it comes to getting interviewed and making good first impressions—I live to compete and be a “fighter” in any aspect of life- my parents divorced when I was 14-15—my brother switched schools before I did so I basically lived alone for 6 months until I joined him and my dad in a new city not too far away from my moms house- my dad got custody (in ny if youre wondering)—I love having fun but my crazy stuff is done with for the most part- I like singing stupid stuff and making people comfortable around me—I don’t like metal or country or bluegrass—I like rap and pop and hiphop and classical to bigband and Sinatra and gene Kelly stuff—I think I’m poor but I get by on what little I have with never-ending support from my dad and his parents when they can- I’m very fortunate- and I miss my brother who is in basic training in texas right now---he’s going to med school right before I leave for football camp—so yeah--- I’m done for now- I’ll try to respond to comments if I get any and I’ll check out your page if I can figure out how to do that--- sleep well everybody